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Entries for November, 2007

November 20th, 2007

The Fantastical Tale Of Arthur Fickelstein And The Missing Vent Visors
POSTED AT 09:00 PM

This is the tale of Arthur Fickelstein, a man whose dreams whose dreams come crashing down due to missing vent visors.

The year is 1994.  It is Friday evening and the Fickelstein residence is alive with laughter. Everyone knows that Friday nights in the 90’s spells TGIF.  Arthur Fickelstein, loving father and devoted husband, is performing his weekly family room comedy routine.

“What kind of animal wouldn't you want to play cards with?”
A cheetah.

His kids, Timmy and Jimmy, erupt with laughter. Lisa, Arthur’s wife, is parked next to them on the couch, anxiously awaiting the latest episode of Full House to come on.  This was a typical Friday night routine for the Fickelsteins.  After a long week of work and school they would all relax, eat pizza, watch TGIF and smile until their cheeks hurt. Life was good - darn good, if ya ask me.

Arthur worked as an internet consultant, working to battle the Y2K dilemma.  He enjoyed his job, but didn’t want to spend his whole life worrying about computer problems. Arthur’s mind was quick as a rat trap.  He knew that his job wouldn’t last a day past January 1, 2000.  So why sit around and wait for his career to end?  Instead, Arthur started looking for new jobs; more permanent jobs where he wouldn’t have to worry so much. And after just a few days of looking, he found the perfect job – manager of an automotive company.  “Hey, computers may come and go, but cars are here to stay,” he thought.

So Arthur brushed up on his automotive knowledge, sent in his resume and landed an interview that week – Friday.  That morning he trimmed his nails, took a Q-tip to his ears, threw on his power tie and made his favorite breakfast.  He was feeling good.  He felt confident.  He was going to get that job.

Arthur, being the smart fellow that he was, left his house an hour early for a drive that would only take twenty minutes.  On his way he made a quick stop at one of those quick car washes; the ones where you don’t have to even get out of your car. Surely he couldn’t pull up to an interview at a car company in a dirty car.  When Arthur’s 1992 Ford Taurus pulled out of that car wash that candy apple red paint was sparkling like a sparkler on the 4th of July.  

Everything was going well until Arthur hit the highway.  There must have been an accident because traffic was barely moving.  “On no!” Arthur thought.  “I need to make it there on time.”  He was only going to the next exit, so he pulled into the narrow shoulder, one wheel on grass, one on pavement.  Suddenly his right tire dipped into a pot hole, splashing his entire car in dark droopy, chunky mud.  Arrrrghhhhhh!  

The time was now 10:47.  His interview was at 11.  He definitely didn’t have time to go back to the car wash.  He flipped on his wipers, pulled the washer fluid lever and started cleaning the windows.  But Arthur forgot that his windows were open.  When the fluid shot out, the wind blew a mixture of glass cleaner and mud all over Arthur.  This was the last straw.  His car was dirty, his suit was dirty, and worst of all, he was now late.  You could imagine the look on the interviewer’s face when Arthur finally showed up.

Needless to say, Arthur did not get the job.  That night when he got home there were no, no pizza, no Full House - just an empty shell of man. Oh yea, and it turns out everything was fine when the year 2000 hit.  Oh well, I guess Arthur should have just kept his job.  



What could he have done to avoid this? Well, if he had considered adding vent visors and bug shields to his car, he could have avoided that whole mess. Oh well, TGIF – Mike Rosania


November 28th, 2007

Discover Why Ladder Racks And Husky Liners Are The Bread And Butter Combo
POSTED AT 05:22 PM

I’ve been in the landscaping business for four years now and I wanted to let you guys in on two key products. After graduating high school I realized that college wasn’t for me. I wasn’t interested in writing papers, attending lectures and burning the midnight oil at the library. For me, there was just one interest – running my own business. So that’s exactly what I did. It all started with a truck. I bought a used red and white 1992 Ford F150 off some old man that lived down the street from me. He cut me a good deal because he wasn’t able to get in and out of it anymore. It wasn’t the best looking girl at the party – had dings all over it, some rust spots and a bent bumper – but it got the job done. What really sold me on it was the big bed. From lawnmowers to rakes, the back of this truck held pretty much everything I needed. That was until my business started to take off. Word started getting around that I did a good job so my I started getting a lot more business. The problem now was that I needed to expand. That’s one thing my grandpa always told me. “You gotta keep growing. If you don’t, you’re dead in the water.” So I took pops advice and hired a partner. He didn’t have a truck but he was ready to work hard and owned lot of equipment. That huge f150 bed didn’t seem so big anymore. What was once an empty metal storage area suddenly seemed a lot smaller. We knew we had to do something about our overflowing tools so we invested in a ladder rack, which worked out great. It could hold all of our ladders, long tree saws and any other oversized equipment we needed. We also invested in a nice set of Husky floor liners. After spending 4 hours outside cutting branches, trimming hedges, and edging lawns we’re covered in grass, leaves, dirt and sweat. Even though we expect our truck to get dirty, nothing’s worse then having to spend everyday driving around in your own filth. Our interior was disgusting; constantly get caked with mud and grass. With the new floor mats, we could just pull out the mess, hose them down and be good to go. A few years have passed since those days of driving around in a beat up f150. We ended up buying two new trucks. We each have a 2007 F250 with trailers for our gear. We have also hired more workers to accommodate all the business we get. Our crew now consists of 10 workers and we have expanded our services to include snow plowing during the winter months. But guess what? We still have our ladder racks on the back and sturdy floor mats in the cab. Even though we keep expanding, we will always use these “bread and butter” items. You’ll be surprised how helpful these items can be. Like this one time, Jerry sliced his hand wide open on one of the chain saws. Blood was pouring out of him like the Colorado River rapids. I quickly wrapped a towel around his hand, shoved him in the truck, and sped to the hospital. When we finally got there, the floor in front of him was covered in blood. Luckily, most of the liquid was contained in the floor liner. I was able to dump the blood out of my truck without staining the interior and you can barely see it now. These staples have saved our butts many times, just thought I’d let you guys know. If any of you are considering getting into the landscaping business, seriously consider checking out ladder racks and Husky Liners. My pair has lasted the past 4 years! – Mike Rosania


November 30th, 2007

Add Floor Liners And A Cold Air Intake To Your Christmas List This Year
POSTED AT 01:07 AM

Don’t know what to ask for this Christmas? Why not ask for something you can actually use – durable floor mats. The fresh smell of evergreen and incessant jingling of bells can mean only one thing: Christmas time. Ah yes, the season for giving. But your days of toys and bicycles and games are behind you. Don’t fret, there are plenty of good gifts to get. He’s making a list, he’s checking it twice… Have you been naughty? Have you been nice? Have too many curse words poured out of that cynical mouth of yours? Been flirting a little too much with the new leggy secretary? Hopefully, your courteous and noble deeds have landed you on the nice list this Christmas season. If so, cash in on that good behavior and make a killer wish list. So what should you ask for? Well, you may not be able to get that new truck you’ve been dying for, but you can still get some great accessories. During the winter months, a majority of our country is bombarded with snow and ice. I used to live in Boston so I know how long winter really is. A solid set of floor liners make an excellent present. And although they may not be the “coolest” present, they are a great investment. Plus, they aren’t cheap! Why not have someone else shell out the bills for them so you can spend your money on what really want – beer and season tickets. If you’re like me and enjoy getting to the mountains, then rubber mats are a “must have” item. When I get into my car after a long day of snowboarding, I don’t want to deal with being clean. I just want to rip open some chips and chuck the wrapper on the ground. I also to keep my feet warm, especially after being in ski boots all day. So my car’s floor heater will melt all the snow that my boots have accumulated. Without my floor mats, my feet would be resting in a puddle of water by the time I get home. Any not to be too gross, but my feet usually aren’t too “fresh” after skiing. Actually, I think the smell of damp, sweaty feet will probably make you gag. Now that I have liners, I can just open the door at a red light, pour out the water and be good to go. I don’t want to beat a dead horse, but I highly recommend getting some mats. Now that I have covered the practical mats, the Dr. Jekyll if you will, I want to suggest getting a cold air intake, the Mr. Hyde. There are few “fun” presents to ask for once you hit 18, but I believe this is one of them. I don’t drive a Ferrari, but I still crave performance and get a thrill when I slam on the gas pedal. A cold air intake is an aftermarket air intake that is specifically designed to draw cooler air into the engine, thus giving you more horsepower. And this part will also give your vehicle a nice throaty growl; unlike your buddy’s Honda with the tin can muffler. It depends on your vehicle and what modifications you have, but adding a cold air intake can add anywhere from 5 to 40 ponies. Not bad for a few hundred bucks if you ask me. I recommend these two products because they are moderately cheap and give you the best bang for your buck. If you are really craving performance, then you might want to ask for a whole performance exhaust system. But I guess that depends on how naughty or nice you were this year. I personally use a Volant Cold Air Intake and Husky Liners, but shop around first to find a combo that fits best for your vehicle. – Mike Rosania


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